OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG
Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I need to warn you:
THIS POST CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR ALL THREE BOOKS IN THE LEVIATHAN TRILOGY.
Moving on.
This book was amazing. Seriously. I loved it so much that I am going to start with the three things I hated about it and then move on to the fangirling. That way, I can get it off my chest.
1. Anastasia never showed up. I mean, durr, I knew she wasn't going to, but seriously! At the time, she'd have been fourteen, just old enough to fit into Alek and Deryn and Lilit and Newkirk's little gang. She's awesome. She was also a bit of a prankster, which would have been hilarious aboard the Leviathan. Moving on.
2. Remember the April Fool's Day art reveal? The one that made like fifty of us practically pee ourselves? This one? I really wanted it to be real. Really, really wanted it. I was also hoping that maybe it was two separate images stuck together, because I don't care about Alek destroying the chapel in his pirate walker as long as Deryn and Lilit are in some terribly awkward situation involving Lilit in a wedding dress. I like awkwardness, don't I?
Completely off topic, did you know that Scott's blog is the fourth most visited site on my browser? Because I'm totally not a stalker.
3. Alek never really got jealous of Deryn, which my buddy this girl recently pointed out to me, which sucks for Deryn because it's, like, not fair. Or something.
I don't know, all right?
Now, on to the important stuff.
THE REVEAL.
I'm glad Alek got to figure it out on his own. I mean, we're so mean to him anyway. He's a dummkopf in every fanfiction (especially mine... gah) and we sort of rag on him all the time, so he deserves something. Although it could have been more, you know, fun. Dramatic.
DERYN IN A KIMONO
Did not happen >:( C'mon, Scott, that would have taken like no effort to just stick her in a kimono for like five seconds. As long as there's an illustration we really don't care.
BOVRIL CREATING AN ARMY OF SPIDERS THAT LITERALLY BARK
Okay, fine. I have my limits.
Anyway, I finished this book about a day after I got it, and got it about five days after it came out, and then started this post about five minutes thereafter, but I kind of saved it as a draft, left off halfway through a sentence, and forgot to finish it. Oh well.
What Would Make Me Really Happy Right Now:
-Sushi
-Some of that soup that I can smell cooking but isn't done yet
-More books. Need more books
Next Books:
Birthmarked, WGWG (still...) 1984, some other stuff
Showing posts with label Spoiler. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Spoiler. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Friday, June 17, 2011
The Woman Who Rides Like A Man
Dang that title is an innuendo.
ANYWAY
I think I need to do another letter to the character. She didn't answer my last one, and as I am on Facebook, I believe the correct way to deal with this situation is to KEEP BUGGING HER TILL SHE DOES. (for the record, that is a joke, because I know if anyone reads that they'll ask.)
Not like anyone reads this anyway.
Dear Alanna,
You did not completely disappoint me this time around. Only somewhat. See, what I love about you is that even though you get sluttier and less adorable (did you know google chrome recognizes "sluttier" as a word? Wait, you don't know what that is. You're from the middle ages. Also, you're NOT REAL.) by the minute, you also got more badass. You don't go all OMG I LOVE YOU SO IM GONNA JUST BETRAY LITTLE ADORABLE PAGE ALANNA AND EVERYTHING SHE WORKED FOR FOR LIKE FIVE YEARS AND JUST SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE BEING ALL ILOVEYOU! WITH JON. Instead, well, you've asserted yourself as a total BA to that jerk prince of yours, who is now flirting with some DUMB BLONDE CHICK WHO'S HOTTER THAN YOU AND SLUTTIER BUT HEY YOU'RE BETTER THAN THEM SO WHO EVEN CARES because you have George who is way better anyway. I always preferred him.
I like your performance regarding the little shaman girls. And Ishak deserved to die. Do not cross a girl who rides horses, does magic, wields epic swords of awesome, and has a pet cat that may in fact be a god. Basically, is someone that cool tells you not to do something, for god's sake don't do it.
That is all.
-your least-favorite person in the world besides Duke Roger,
Manon
What would make me really happy right now:
-sushiiii
-more books
-more reading time
-to not be so tired
Next book: either Lioness Rampant or Enclave
PS this book is one of the few examples of the love triangle of doom (see Matched for an explanation of this, I might even start making posts on this sort of thing) that I actually like. I'm making a new tag: Love Triangle Of Doom.
ANYWAY
I think I need to do another letter to the character. She didn't answer my last one, and as I am on Facebook, I believe the correct way to deal with this situation is to KEEP BUGGING HER TILL SHE DOES. (for the record, that is a joke, because I know if anyone reads that they'll ask.)
Not like anyone reads this anyway.
Dear Alanna,
You did not completely disappoint me this time around. Only somewhat. See, what I love about you is that even though you get sluttier and less adorable (did you know google chrome recognizes "sluttier" as a word? Wait, you don't know what that is. You're from the middle ages. Also, you're NOT REAL.) by the minute, you also got more badass. You don't go all OMG I LOVE YOU SO IM GONNA JUST BETRAY LITTLE ADORABLE PAGE ALANNA AND EVERYTHING SHE WORKED FOR FOR LIKE FIVE YEARS AND JUST SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE BEING ALL ILOVEYOU! WITH JON. Instead, well, you've asserted yourself as a total BA to that jerk prince of yours, who is now flirting with some DUMB BLONDE CHICK WHO'S HOTTER THAN YOU AND SLUTTIER BUT HEY YOU'RE BETTER THAN THEM SO WHO EVEN CARES because you have George who is way better anyway. I always preferred him.
I like your performance regarding the little shaman girls. And Ishak deserved to die. Do not cross a girl who rides horses, does magic, wields epic swords of awesome, and has a pet cat that may in fact be a god. Basically, is someone that cool tells you not to do something, for god's sake don't do it.
That is all.
-your least-favorite person in the world besides Duke Roger,
Manon
What would make me really happy right now:
-sushiiii
-more books
-more reading time
-to not be so tired
Next book: either Lioness Rampant or Enclave
PS this book is one of the few examples of the love triangle of doom (see Matched for an explanation of this, I might even start making posts on this sort of thing) that I actually like. I'm making a new tag: Love Triangle Of Doom.
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Matched
Matched is the first book I've encountered by Ally Condie. (Wanna get the author's name in there early cuz I've heard this isn't the only "Matched" in popular YA literature.)
Okay, so I found this book on Amazon while hunting for more good YA dystopians (Yay futuristic hell holes!) and I read this first chapter anditwasgood. So I bought it.
I actually enjoyed it quite a bit, but I'm still going to be Critical in this one.
THIS IS WHAT WAS GOOD ABOUT THIS BOOK. (I had English finals today so I'm not even gonna try to be smart. Be prepared for poor grammar and random capitalization.) I like the writing style. It's not like the Goddess Of Writing Jodi Piccoult, but it's pretty. Most dystopians, like say, the Hunger Games, begin with a main character that already knows that the government is evil and Man This Place Sucks and all that because they're already a victim and have been their whole lives. However, this is the first one I've read so far where the character actually believed due to her lifetime of indoctrination that the Futuristic Conspiracy To Control Our Minds! was actually the way to go. Gradually she's been submerged into the idea of These Dudes Are Whacked and People Are Dying Man, mostly through Ky, who is in fact the character who knows how Man This Place Sucks. The dystopia itself was also well-developed. I think I'm going to come up with a set of guidelines for well-developed alternative universes/dystopias:
Each one needs to establish:
-the standard mode of transportation (for instance, we have cars and sometimes planes. The Hunger Games has trains. Uglies has hoverboards and hovercars. Matched has a hovertrain or airtrain or something.)
-the way they get their food (we buy it at a store and cook it ourselves, or go to a restaurant. We generally dispense it through a refrigerator. Uglies get fed through a hole in the wall where Magical Objects of Awesome! come out. Hunger Games people hunt (but only if they're badass) or buy it from the black market (if they're semi-badass) or get it from the government if they're chicken.
-propaganda--what makes them obey (uglies: YOU MUST BE PRETTY OMG. Hunger Games: well, the hunger games themselves. Matched: everything is better here because we use probability and our people livelongerandarehappierandcrap.)
-main source of entertainment--what the people do for fun. (Hunger games: watch the hunger games on TV [we're talking capitol idiots here] uglies: go to parties and get creepy surgeries. Matched: game center, music hall, movie showings, leisure activities)
-Clothing: there must be a fashion scheme. (matched: uniforms denoting students, workers and officials; Uglies: crazy fashioncostumethingies for pretties, and didn't the uglies have like a uniform or something? Hunger Games: lots of raggy old cloth stuff. They're madpooryo.)
-Government Creepers: like the gestapo. Publicly known; usually feared. (Hunger games: peacekeepers. Matched: Officials. Uglies: wardens. Also Special Circumstances, but less public.)
-Fancy Board Of Government Jerks Who Decide Stuff (Uglies: the Pretty Committee. HG: the Gamemakers. Matched: I think we find out in the next volume xDD )[I just realized that was my first emote all post.]
-I think they're all communists. (actually, that's not a principle. But i think it's true. I might make a post entirely devoted to the fact that I think that Matched, The Hunger Games, and Uglies are all set in communist "futures" and it's all 1984alloveragain.)
Ok, now for my Critiques:
I read all fourhundredsomeodd pages and I still don't feel like I'm BFFs with Cassia, Ky, Em and Xander. They're not the most developed characters, and they're still kind of in that stage of development like the book just started and I don't know them yet. I think the most developed characters were Bram and the granfather, and since Grandpa died in like chapter four, that's saying something.
AND THE LOVE TRIANGLE OMG. It's less creative than Twilight. It pretty much IS twilight. I am going to outline a situation, and you try to think of every YA novel with this basic scenario or one very similar:
Boy1 likes girl. Girl likes boy but doesn't know it yet. Girl meets boy2 and falls in OMGlove! but girl and boy2 can't be together. girl finds out about boy1 but since she can have him he's unappealing even though he's better for her and everyone around her. He's just not as hot. So girl makes out with both of them and eventually either ends up with boy2 or realizes that boy1 was better all along, often following the death or destruction, if not betrayal, of boy2.
How many books did you come up with? Like, every YA novel ever? See? they're all the same. WillsomeonepleasewritemeagooddystopiannovelwithaNEWromanticsituationthankyou?
Ok. That is all.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Suuushiiii
-for someone to write me a novel according to the guidelines above.
-no more tests please school ok?
-more time to read at school
next book: The Woman Who Rides Like A Man
CHALLENGE: outline a romance taking place in a dystopia that is ORIGINAL.
Okay, so I found this book on Amazon while hunting for more good YA dystopians (Yay futuristic hell holes!) and I read this first chapter anditwasgood. So I bought it.
I actually enjoyed it quite a bit, but I'm still going to be Critical in this one.
THIS IS WHAT WAS GOOD ABOUT THIS BOOK. (I had English finals today so I'm not even gonna try to be smart. Be prepared for poor grammar and random capitalization.) I like the writing style. It's not like the Goddess Of Writing Jodi Piccoult, but it's pretty. Most dystopians, like say, the Hunger Games, begin with a main character that already knows that the government is evil and Man This Place Sucks and all that because they're already a victim and have been their whole lives. However, this is the first one I've read so far where the character actually believed due to her lifetime of indoctrination that the Futuristic Conspiracy To Control Our Minds! was actually the way to go. Gradually she's been submerged into the idea of These Dudes Are Whacked and People Are Dying Man, mostly through Ky, who is in fact the character who knows how Man This Place Sucks. The dystopia itself was also well-developed. I think I'm going to come up with a set of guidelines for well-developed alternative universes/dystopias:
Each one needs to establish:
-the standard mode of transportation (for instance, we have cars and sometimes planes. The Hunger Games has trains. Uglies has hoverboards and hovercars. Matched has a hovertrain or airtrain or something.)
-the way they get their food (we buy it at a store and cook it ourselves, or go to a restaurant. We generally dispense it through a refrigerator. Uglies get fed through a hole in the wall where Magical Objects of Awesome! come out. Hunger Games people hunt (but only if they're badass) or buy it from the black market (if they're semi-badass) or get it from the government if they're chicken.
-propaganda--what makes them obey (uglies: YOU MUST BE PRETTY OMG. Hunger Games: well, the hunger games themselves. Matched: everything is better here because we use probability and our people livelongerandarehappierandcrap.)
-main source of entertainment--what the people do for fun. (Hunger games: watch the hunger games on TV [we're talking capitol idiots here] uglies: go to parties and get creepy surgeries. Matched: game center, music hall, movie showings, leisure activities)
-Clothing: there must be a fashion scheme. (matched: uniforms denoting students, workers and officials; Uglies: crazy fashioncostumethingies for pretties, and didn't the uglies have like a uniform or something? Hunger Games: lots of raggy old cloth stuff. They're madpooryo.)
-Government Creepers: like the gestapo. Publicly known; usually feared. (Hunger games: peacekeepers. Matched: Officials. Uglies: wardens. Also Special Circumstances, but less public.)
-Fancy Board Of Government Jerks Who Decide Stuff (Uglies: the Pretty Committee. HG: the Gamemakers. Matched: I think we find out in the next volume xDD )[I just realized that was my first emote all post.]
-I think they're all communists. (actually, that's not a principle. But i think it's true. I might make a post entirely devoted to the fact that I think that Matched, The Hunger Games, and Uglies are all set in communist "futures" and it's all 1984alloveragain.)
Ok, now for my Critiques:
I read all fourhundredsomeodd pages and I still don't feel like I'm BFFs with Cassia, Ky, Em and Xander. They're not the most developed characters, and they're still kind of in that stage of development like the book just started and I don't know them yet. I think the most developed characters were Bram and the granfather, and since Grandpa died in like chapter four, that's saying something.
AND THE LOVE TRIANGLE OMG. It's less creative than Twilight. It pretty much IS twilight. I am going to outline a situation, and you try to think of every YA novel with this basic scenario or one very similar:
Boy1 likes girl. Girl likes boy but doesn't know it yet. Girl meets boy2 and falls in OMGlove! but girl and boy2 can't be together. girl finds out about boy1 but since she can have him he's unappealing even though he's better for her and everyone around her. He's just not as hot. So girl makes out with both of them and eventually either ends up with boy2 or realizes that boy1 was better all along, often following the death or destruction, if not betrayal, of boy2.
How many books did you come up with? Like, every YA novel ever? See? they're all the same. WillsomeonepleasewritemeagooddystopiannovelwithaNEWromanticsituationthankyou?
Ok. That is all.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Suuushiiii
-for someone to write me a novel according to the guidelines above.
-no more tests please school ok?
-more time to read at school
next book: The Woman Who Rides Like A Man
CHALLENGE: outline a romance taking place in a dystopia that is ORIGINAL.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
In the Hand of the Goddess
Dear Alanna,
Awww, I love you. You're so adorable. Except you're old now, which is really annoying. You were so much cuter when you were all awkward and twelve and like OMGEWBOYSARESOGROSS. And I totally love that You have sort of made out with George a little, so I am happy in that respect. However, I am a bit concerned for the future of your character.
First of all, you're all old and such, so you won't be as fun and adorable. That makes me sad. Also, you're with Jon now. The problem with characters actually hooking up is that there's really not a lot you can do with them now. I mean, if they're SUPPOSED to make out, where's the fun in that? So, chances are, they will break up. Which is annoying. (Note the fact that I cannot write romance because my characters are usually broken up within the same chapter they got together in. I mean, teenage relationships only last so long. "They got together... and yeah. They lived happily ever after." I can't get any thrill into a relationship that WORKS, so I naturally have to destroy it.) If you and Jon stay together for the next two books, they will probably bore me to tears. So, I can tell you this now--whether or not you end up with Jon, the two of you are doomed to some sort of breakup. Also, while George is still alive, he will always be "stalking" you, as you so eleagantly put it. So you two are probably going to make out some more. So please, break up with Jon first, because if you make out with George while you're still with Jon, I'm going to have to consider you a slut, and I don't like sluts. They bother me. They also suck to read about because they are almost always selfish and inconsiderate.
One thing you need to remember in the next book is that you are a knight. You might be a girl and the prince's lover, but you have responsibilities. As pretty much every book of this genre in which the couple hooks up before the end, it is very easy to forget the mission at hand and just run off into the sunset, especially since the mission at hand is fulfilling your responsibilities as a knight of Tortall, which poses no immediate foreseeable danger toward you or a loved one, so running off into the sunset almost sounds kind of reasonable. But No! You must not turn into a girl on me! Just because everyone knows you're female now does not mean that you need to act like it. Remember why you got into this! You cannot betray your adorable twelve-year-old self!
Also, the epilogue suggests that you are leaving on your Adventure! without either George or Jon. There are only a few ways this could go romantically:
1. You spend the whole Adventure! missing Jon and being all "omgimissyoucomebacktome" (Conclusion: the book will suck)
2. Jon shows up at some point and joins you. (Conclusion: The book could go either way.)
3. George shows up at some point and joins you. You guys have fabulous Adventures! but you stay true to Jon. (Conclusion: the book will be okay.)
4. George shows up at some point and joins you. You cheat on Jon because George is older, better, cooler, and also immediately avaliable. (Conclusion: you're a slut and the book kind of sucks, except that George is there and he makes me happy so I'll probably enjoy it somewhat anyway.)
5. You meet a new guy and, due to the law of Everyone Likes the Sexy Maingirl Who Doesn't Realize How Sexy She Is, he falls in love with you and you totally betray Jon but that's okay because he's hot and immediately avaliable. (Conclusion: the book sucks and you're a slut.)
6. You end up back at the palace, there are no Adventures!, and you stay with Jon. (Conclusion: Boooo-ring.)
7. You end up back at the palace, there are no Adventures! of the predicted sort, but you dump Jon/he dumps you, and you and George do something awesome. (Conclusion: this might be pretty good...)
8. Jon has to marry politically (or he finds a new slut) and you run off with George/new guy/etc. and have Adventures!
9. You actually make it through the Adventures! without any romantic affiliation, act like Mini Alanna again, and I love you. (Conclusion: Congratulations! You're awesome! But this will never happen!!!)
Choose wisely, my child. Choose wisely.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Book 3
-My copy of book 2 to have the small cover because the ghetto-copies have the adorable Alannas whereas the big ones have Alanna the Slut, who looks like Tinkerbell crossed with a fish with strawberry vomit on her head (wait, that's HAIR???)
-Sushi
-Money
Next Book: Maybe Paper Towns? I mean, I'm almost done with that thing...
Awww, I love you. You're so adorable. Except you're old now, which is really annoying. You were so much cuter when you were all awkward and twelve and like OMGEWBOYSARESOGROSS. And I totally love that You have sort of made out with George a little, so I am happy in that respect. However, I am a bit concerned for the future of your character.
First of all, you're all old and such, so you won't be as fun and adorable. That makes me sad. Also, you're with Jon now. The problem with characters actually hooking up is that there's really not a lot you can do with them now. I mean, if they're SUPPOSED to make out, where's the fun in that? So, chances are, they will break up. Which is annoying. (Note the fact that I cannot write romance because my characters are usually broken up within the same chapter they got together in. I mean, teenage relationships only last so long. "They got together... and yeah. They lived happily ever after." I can't get any thrill into a relationship that WORKS, so I naturally have to destroy it.) If you and Jon stay together for the next two books, they will probably bore me to tears. So, I can tell you this now--whether or not you end up with Jon, the two of you are doomed to some sort of breakup. Also, while George is still alive, he will always be "stalking" you, as you so eleagantly put it. So you two are probably going to make out some more. So please, break up with Jon first, because if you make out with George while you're still with Jon, I'm going to have to consider you a slut, and I don't like sluts. They bother me. They also suck to read about because they are almost always selfish and inconsiderate.
One thing you need to remember in the next book is that you are a knight. You might be a girl and the prince's lover, but you have responsibilities. As pretty much every book of this genre in which the couple hooks up before the end, it is very easy to forget the mission at hand and just run off into the sunset, especially since the mission at hand is fulfilling your responsibilities as a knight of Tortall, which poses no immediate foreseeable danger toward you or a loved one, so running off into the sunset almost sounds kind of reasonable. But No! You must not turn into a girl on me! Just because everyone knows you're female now does not mean that you need to act like it. Remember why you got into this! You cannot betray your adorable twelve-year-old self!
Also, the epilogue suggests that you are leaving on your Adventure! without either George or Jon. There are only a few ways this could go romantically:
1. You spend the whole Adventure! missing Jon and being all "omgimissyoucomebacktome" (Conclusion: the book will suck)
2. Jon shows up at some point and joins you. (Conclusion: The book could go either way.)
3. George shows up at some point and joins you. You guys have fabulous Adventures! but you stay true to Jon. (Conclusion: the book will be okay.)
4. George shows up at some point and joins you. You cheat on Jon because George is older, better, cooler, and also immediately avaliable. (Conclusion: you're a slut and the book kind of sucks, except that George is there and he makes me happy so I'll probably enjoy it somewhat anyway.)
5. You meet a new guy and, due to the law of Everyone Likes the Sexy Maingirl Who Doesn't Realize How Sexy She Is, he falls in love with you and you totally betray Jon but that's okay because he's hot and immediately avaliable. (Conclusion: the book sucks and you're a slut.)
6. You end up back at the palace, there are no Adventures!, and you stay with Jon. (Conclusion: Boooo-ring.)
7. You end up back at the palace, there are no Adventures! of the predicted sort, but you dump Jon/he dumps you, and you and George do something awesome. (Conclusion: this might be pretty good...)
8. Jon has to marry politically (or he finds a new slut) and you run off with George/new guy/etc. and have Adventures!
9. You actually make it through the Adventures! without any romantic affiliation, act like Mini Alanna again, and I love you. (Conclusion: Congratulations! You're awesome! But this will never happen!!!)
Choose wisely, my child. Choose wisely.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Book 3
-My copy of book 2 to have the small cover because the ghetto-copies have the adorable Alannas whereas the big ones have Alanna the Slut, who looks like Tinkerbell crossed with a fish with strawberry vomit on her head (wait, that's HAIR???)
-Sushi
-Money
Next Book: Maybe Paper Towns? I mean, I'm almost done with that thing...
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
CITY OF FALLEN ANGELS
MAJOR SPOILERS, JUST SO YA KNOW.
LIKE, SERIOUSLY.
Okay, this is going to sound weird, but I AM weird and you know that. So I'll confide in the POSSIBLE ZERO READERS OF THIS BLOG that while reading this book I was screaming at the characters, literally speaking out lound telling them what to do.
And not while home alone. I do this with PEOPLE WATCHING.
So I think I'm going to format this post as my instructions to individual characters, plus ratings on how much I liked them. (1-10, ten is the highest <3)
MAIA:
Honestly, you didn't piss me off too much this time. I didn't like you that much before, but you've won my appreciation <3 GOOD DOGGIE GOOD GIRL. YOU DESERVE A BISCUIT.
JORDAN:
Ditto. You actually made me pretty happy a few times. And I got to quote you once or twice on the Wall of Epic located in my library.
ISABELLE:
So, I will always love you, being so amazingly awesome in every way. You pretty much weren't too evil. I give you an 11. (You really got a nine, but I scale two points for you being so fabulous. ALSO OLIVIA IF YOU'RE DUMB ENOUGH TO READ THIS I TOTALLY WON THE SAIA VS SISABELLE DEBATE FTW.)
Also, it's annoying how everyone in fanfiction and art thinks you have blue eyes even though book one clearly states that they are black. It doesn't remond you often though, the way it does Alec's blue ones, but in this book it comes up a lot.
SIMON:
Beginning of the book: *slap* C'mon Si, you know better than two DATE TWO GIRLS AT ONCE WHO BOTH KNOW EACH OTHER AND CAN QUITE EASILY KICK YOUR ASS ALONG WITH THOSE OF ALL OF THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU. ESPECIALLY SINCE ONE HAS CLAWS AND IS A WEREWOLF AND THE OTHER HAS A WHIP AND KNOWS HOW TO USE IT. TO KILL DEMONS. 1. (that point is just for the fact that you're a bass player.)
End of book: YAY MY SIMON IS BACK *hug* 9.
Also, it bothers me how you were like 6'5 in the first book and all insanelytallandstuff and then in the last chapter you were all OMG IM ALL 5'6 AND SHORTER THAN EVERYONE even though you were all TALLER THAN JACE HAHAH MAN PRIDE in book 1. AND IT'S BEEN LIKE TWO MONTHS SINCE THEN SO DO NOT BLAME PUBERTY.
MAUREEN:
I love you. You're just so cute and out of your league and terrifying and I want to see you kick some demon ass and maybe make out with Simon. If Cassie loves me. (She usually loves me, so I have hope.) I was quite determined that you would return as a vampire, so there was no surprise there. We have not seen the last of you, and YOU WILL DO ANNOYING, AWESOME, AND/OR EVIL THINGS FOR ME IN THE FUTURE, NON? 10 for the rainbow armwarmers.
ALEC:
You were being kind of whiny most of the book, but I guess if I had just found out I was the latest in the long line of lovers, I'd be rather miffed. And then when you shoved Clary out of the elevator, I really wanted to hug you. So you get an 8.
CLARY:
Honestly, I really only love you because you make out with Jace. Also, you're short. Short people are awesome. (See, Sammy? I'm only mean to short people 'cuz I'm jealous.) You get a 9 for being all assertive of your femininity and not all OMG JACE WE CANNOT BE TOGETHER *WHINECRYWAILMOAN* and instead all WTF JACE YOU ARE SO OVERDRAMATIC MY FATHER IS DEAD WE ARE NOT SIBLINGS YOU ARE NOT A DEMON SO THERE REALLY IS NO REASON WE CANNOT BE TOGETHER SO SHUT UP AND KISS ME.
MAGNUS:
Oh, Magnus. Why are you such a slut? I guess I can understand TV tropes' "everything that moves" comment when you mentioned the djinn. And the genie. And the other stuff. But I still love you. Just don't break Alec's heart or I BREAK YOUR FACE. 8.
CAMILLE:
I don't like you. you get a 2 for being French.
JONATHAN CHRISTOPHER MORGENSTERN AKA SEBASTION:
-123456789087654321345678976543245678987654 for obvious reasons.
LILITH:
That to the power of googleplex. Plex. Plex. Plex. Plex.
JACE:
Saving you for last. The mainchick's boyfriend always needs the most lecturing.
So, here goes.
1. YOU AND CLARY ARE NOT SIBLINGS. YOU ARE NOT A DEMON. YOU ARE NOT VALENTINE NOR ARE YOU HIS SON. SO FIND A WAY TO KILL SEBASTION/JCM AND GO BE CLARY'S BOYFRIEND SOMEWHERE LIKE A GOOD LITTLE SHADOWHUNTER.
2. I'M REALLY MAD AT YOU BUT I CAN'T COME UP WITH A GOOD REASON SO DEAL WITH YOUR PROBLEMS AND THEN STOP WHINING.
3. I'M NOT EVEN USING CAPS LOCK. HOLDING DOWN THE SHIFT KEY MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I'M VENTING MY ANGER.
WHAT WOULD MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW:
-SUSHI
-Jace to be a good little shadowhunter and get rid of his girlfriend's brother and OH MY GOD STOP WHINING
-BOOK 5. NOW.
-More books
-My books to alphabetize and shelf themselves. I'm catalogueing by author's last name for the first time and like, I have 48 books under the letter B alone. And that's less than S, C and W.
Next book: Revolution? Idk.
LIKE, SERIOUSLY.
Okay, this is going to sound weird, but I AM weird and you know that. So I'll confide in the POSSIBLE ZERO READERS OF THIS BLOG that while reading this book I was screaming at the characters, literally speaking out lound telling them what to do.
And not while home alone. I do this with PEOPLE WATCHING.
So I think I'm going to format this post as my instructions to individual characters, plus ratings on how much I liked them. (1-10, ten is the highest <3)
MAIA:
Honestly, you didn't piss me off too much this time. I didn't like you that much before, but you've won my appreciation <3 GOOD DOGGIE GOOD GIRL. YOU DESERVE A BISCUIT.
JORDAN:
Ditto. You actually made me pretty happy a few times. And I got to quote you once or twice on the Wall of Epic located in my library.
ISABELLE:
So, I will always love you, being so amazingly awesome in every way. You pretty much weren't too evil. I give you an 11. (You really got a nine, but I scale two points for you being so fabulous. ALSO OLIVIA IF YOU'RE DUMB ENOUGH TO READ THIS I TOTALLY WON THE SAIA VS SISABELLE DEBATE FTW.)
Also, it's annoying how everyone in fanfiction and art thinks you have blue eyes even though book one clearly states that they are black. It doesn't remond you often though, the way it does Alec's blue ones, but in this book it comes up a lot.
SIMON:
Beginning of the book: *slap* C'mon Si, you know better than two DATE TWO GIRLS AT ONCE WHO BOTH KNOW EACH OTHER AND CAN QUITE EASILY KICK YOUR ASS ALONG WITH THOSE OF ALL OF THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU. ESPECIALLY SINCE ONE HAS CLAWS AND IS A WEREWOLF AND THE OTHER HAS A WHIP AND KNOWS HOW TO USE IT. TO KILL DEMONS. 1. (that point is just for the fact that you're a bass player.)
End of book: YAY MY SIMON IS BACK *hug* 9.
Also, it bothers me how you were like 6'5 in the first book and all insanelytallandstuff and then in the last chapter you were all OMG IM ALL 5'6 AND SHORTER THAN EVERYONE even though you were all TALLER THAN JACE HAHAH MAN PRIDE in book 1. AND IT'S BEEN LIKE TWO MONTHS SINCE THEN SO DO NOT BLAME PUBERTY.
MAUREEN:
I love you. You're just so cute and out of your league and terrifying and I want to see you kick some demon ass and maybe make out with Simon. If Cassie loves me. (She usually loves me, so I have hope.) I was quite determined that you would return as a vampire, so there was no surprise there. We have not seen the last of you, and YOU WILL DO ANNOYING, AWESOME, AND/OR EVIL THINGS FOR ME IN THE FUTURE, NON? 10 for the rainbow armwarmers.
ALEC:
You were being kind of whiny most of the book, but I guess if I had just found out I was the latest in the long line of lovers, I'd be rather miffed. And then when you shoved Clary out of the elevator, I really wanted to hug you. So you get an 8.
CLARY:
Honestly, I really only love you because you make out with Jace. Also, you're short. Short people are awesome. (See, Sammy? I'm only mean to short people 'cuz I'm jealous.) You get a 9 for being all assertive of your femininity and not all OMG JACE WE CANNOT BE TOGETHER *WHINECRYWAILMOAN* and instead all WTF JACE YOU ARE SO OVERDRAMATIC MY FATHER IS DEAD WE ARE NOT SIBLINGS YOU ARE NOT A DEMON SO THERE REALLY IS NO REASON WE CANNOT BE TOGETHER SO SHUT UP AND KISS ME.
MAGNUS:
Oh, Magnus. Why are you such a slut? I guess I can understand TV tropes' "everything that moves" comment when you mentioned the djinn. And the genie. And the other stuff. But I still love you. Just don't break Alec's heart or I BREAK YOUR FACE. 8.
CAMILLE:
I don't like you. you get a 2 for being French.
JONATHAN CHRISTOPHER MORGENSTERN AKA SEBASTION:
-123456789087654321345678976543245678987654 for obvious reasons.
LILITH:
That to the power of googleplex. Plex. Plex. Plex. Plex.
JACE:
Saving you for last. The mainchick's boyfriend always needs the most lecturing.
So, here goes.
1. YOU AND CLARY ARE NOT SIBLINGS. YOU ARE NOT A DEMON. YOU ARE NOT VALENTINE NOR ARE YOU HIS SON. SO FIND A WAY TO KILL SEBASTION/JCM AND GO BE CLARY'S BOYFRIEND SOMEWHERE LIKE A GOOD LITTLE SHADOWHUNTER.
2. I'M REALLY MAD AT YOU BUT I CAN'T COME UP WITH A GOOD REASON SO DEAL WITH YOUR PROBLEMS AND THEN STOP WHINING.
3. I'M NOT EVEN USING CAPS LOCK. HOLDING DOWN THE SHIFT KEY MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I'M VENTING MY ANGER.
WHAT WOULD MAKE ME REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW:
-SUSHI
-Jace to be a good little shadowhunter and get rid of his girlfriend's brother and OH MY GOD STOP WHINING
-BOOK 5. NOW.
-More books
-My books to alphabetize and shelf themselves. I'm catalogueing by author's last name for the first time and like, I have 48 books under the letter B alone. And that's less than S, C and W.
Next book: Revolution? Idk.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Rebel Angels
I am back!
So, lately I haven't been able to get into a book at all, but today all I wanted to do was read. YES!!! It is not the apocalypse YET! (I'm still prepared for that, though.)
I read the prequel to this, A Great and Terrible Beauty, for summer reading last year. I bought the sequel but let my friend Emily borrow it since I wasn't done with the first one yet.
It took her six months to read it.
But I'm done now, and I really enjoyed it. Except the part where Kartik wasn't there. I love Kartik, or maybe I just love the added sense of holywhat'sgoingon he adds. I still don't know how to pronounce his name.
When I saw the Asa in the letter from Miss Moore, I immediately wrote her name on a post-it and cut it up so that I could mess with the letter. Witht he name Hester Asa Moore, you can make the names of several ancient gods: Ares, Hermes, Hera, and Mars. You can also make Mother, which seemed like a lead, Rooster, Rose and Sea. Then I was messing around and had Sara, then I added the H... and then it all came together. Sarah Rees-Toome! I always thought the last name was funny, she must have invented the name for the anagram rather than the other way around.
I want to read the sequel :D I need money and a trip to the bookstore.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Sushi
-Money
-A trip to the bookstore
Next book: aye dee kay.
So, lately I haven't been able to get into a book at all, but today all I wanted to do was read. YES!!! It is not the apocalypse YET! (I'm still prepared for that, though.)
I read the prequel to this, A Great and Terrible Beauty, for summer reading last year. I bought the sequel but let my friend Emily borrow it since I wasn't done with the first one yet.
It took her six months to read it.
But I'm done now, and I really enjoyed it. Except the part where Kartik wasn't there. I love Kartik, or maybe I just love the added sense of holywhat'sgoingon he adds. I still don't know how to pronounce his name.
When I saw the Asa in the letter from Miss Moore, I immediately wrote her name on a post-it and cut it up so that I could mess with the letter. Witht he name Hester Asa Moore, you can make the names of several ancient gods: Ares, Hermes, Hera, and Mars. You can also make Mother, which seemed like a lead, Rooster, Rose and Sea. Then I was messing around and had Sara, then I added the H... and then it all came together. Sarah Rees-Toome! I always thought the last name was funny, she must have invented the name for the anagram rather than the other way around.
I want to read the sequel :D I need money and a trip to the bookstore.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Sushi
-Money
-A trip to the bookstore
Next book: aye dee kay.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Mockingjay
I literally just finished this minutes ago. I'm still kind of numb from the ending, but I liked the way it ended--with Peeta. Someday kids will be reading this instead of To Kill A Mockingbird, and I like that, but it also scares me. Katniss, Gale, and Peeta didn't seem quite real to me. But the society--that was reality. It was life. It was humanity. And I don't want it to be real.
I have two very big fears. One is death. I don't want to die. I cannot imagine not existing in this world anymore. Also, I want to leave an impact. I cannot go forgotten--I can't! I need to be smarter than Napoleon, more powerful than the medieval Catholic Church, more inspiring than Gandhi, more interesting than any Hapsburg and even more immortal than any artist or writer or philosopher. Maybe these things are far outside of my grasp, but I have to try! Doesn't everyone want to try? Your life is precious. For God's sake, do something with it! The concept of dying forgotten is terrifying in a new kind of way.
I am also afraid of endings. The last time I enter a room; the last time I see a person; the last chance to take part in something. I am afraid of regret.
I am also afraid of things that are already dead. Bodies of people, creatures, anything. I cannot stand their presence. Will they return, soulless, vengeful, come to take me with them to their realm of hatred and sorrow? I do not like death.
This book unsettles me. It is about death, and it ends. Death makes me feel very alone in the world. Right now, I feel very alone. Please, come, I need your company. Please don't die. Please don't kill me.
Let's live forever, and may our book never end.
I think that's how my mind works.
What would make me really happy right now:
-For someone to buy me the second book in Tamora Pierce's series Song of the Lioness, the individual installment entitled In the Hands of the Goddess.
-Sushi and magic sushi powers, see my last post.
-More books
-A green beret.
Next book: Perks or Alanna.
I have two very big fears. One is death. I don't want to die. I cannot imagine not existing in this world anymore. Also, I want to leave an impact. I cannot go forgotten--I can't! I need to be smarter than Napoleon, more powerful than the medieval Catholic Church, more inspiring than Gandhi, more interesting than any Hapsburg and even more immortal than any artist or writer or philosopher. Maybe these things are far outside of my grasp, but I have to try! Doesn't everyone want to try? Your life is precious. For God's sake, do something with it! The concept of dying forgotten is terrifying in a new kind of way.
I am also afraid of endings. The last time I enter a room; the last time I see a person; the last chance to take part in something. I am afraid of regret.
I am also afraid of things that are already dead. Bodies of people, creatures, anything. I cannot stand their presence. Will they return, soulless, vengeful, come to take me with them to their realm of hatred and sorrow? I do not like death.
This book unsettles me. It is about death, and it ends. Death makes me feel very alone in the world. Right now, I feel very alone. Please, come, I need your company. Please don't die. Please don't kill me.
Let's live forever, and may our book never end.
I think that's how my mind works.
What would make me really happy right now:
-For someone to buy me the second book in Tamora Pierce's series Song of the Lioness, the individual installment entitled In the Hands of the Goddess.
-Sushi and magic sushi powers, see my last post.
-More books
-A green beret.
Next book: Perks or Alanna.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Angel
ARGENSHNOGGENHIGGENHOGGENHOOFENBLOGGEN.
ASDFGHJKL.
RAWR.
GRR.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Manon is not happy.
Manon is very not happy.
Manon is so unhappy that she's going to speak in third person for this whole post. Or at least as long as she remembers because when she's angry it's hard for her to concentrate.
I am team Fang. I think Max belongs with Fang because the book was written so that the reader becomes emotionally attatched to FangxMax. (Hey, look! I already dropped the thir person thing! Wow, my attention span=squirrel on---Hey look! A pencil!) When Fang and Max parted at the end, I wasn't totally into the whole DylanxMax thing, as Max was not either. I truly felt as if the guy I used to love had just left me with a possible new boyfriend while he fights evil with my clone. This is pretty good writing, but That Is Not How You End A Series!!! That's what EPILOGUES are for. You get me all sappy and pissed and THEN Max and Fang go make out in a corner and everyone's happy again. Or you write another book. You do not leave Manon feeling pissed. Not. A. Good. Idea. And now Manon has to read To Kill A Mockingbird, which she REALLY DOES NOT WANT TO DO. (See next post with a detailed description of Why That Book Sucks.) (Hey look! Back to third person!) Manon isn't happy now. Manon wants to go die in a corner while ripping up old photos of Max-Manon and Fang, which is not how miss Neverhadaboyfriend Manon should feel after reading a mediocre novel several grades below her reading level. Why does Manon torture herself so? Because words are addictive. Or something. But Manon thinks ther should be a law against ending a Whole Frickin Series (like, seven books long) by crushing her hopes and dreams AND THEN LEAVING HER TO READ TKAM IN UTTER SADNESS AND DEPRESSION. (Authors need to pay more attention to the fact that some (strange yet existant) teenage girls have a habit of using their novels to cushion the blow of the bad stuff, like having to read books that suck and not having a boyfriend. Why does this keep going back to that?)
MANON VERY ANGRY.
You know Manon very angry when she leaves out the verbs, because Manon a grammar snob.
Manon isn't going to post any more tonight because Manon is very angry.
WHAT WOULD MAKE MANON REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW:
-FangxMax
-Angel to have a better ending
-Angel to have a whole sequel that's way better (Called Iggy, duh.)
-Some sushi, beeey-otch.
-Not having to read TKAM (not even going to bother spelling it out. It's not worth the effort.)
-a boyfriend
Next book:TKfrickinAM
ASDFGHJKL.
RAWR.
GRR.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Manon is not happy.
Manon is very not happy.
Manon is so unhappy that she's going to speak in third person for this whole post. Or at least as long as she remembers because when she's angry it's hard for her to concentrate.
I am team Fang. I think Max belongs with Fang because the book was written so that the reader becomes emotionally attatched to FangxMax. (Hey, look! I already dropped the thir person thing! Wow, my attention span=squirrel on---Hey look! A pencil!) When Fang and Max parted at the end, I wasn't totally into the whole DylanxMax thing, as Max was not either. I truly felt as if the guy I used to love had just left me with a possible new boyfriend while he fights evil with my clone. This is pretty good writing, but That Is Not How You End A Series!!! That's what EPILOGUES are for. You get me all sappy and pissed and THEN Max and Fang go make out in a corner and everyone's happy again. Or you write another book. You do not leave Manon feeling pissed. Not. A. Good. Idea. And now Manon has to read To Kill A Mockingbird, which she REALLY DOES NOT WANT TO DO. (See next post with a detailed description of Why That Book Sucks.) (Hey look! Back to third person!) Manon isn't happy now. Manon wants to go die in a corner while ripping up old photos of Max-Manon and Fang, which is not how miss Neverhadaboyfriend Manon should feel after reading a mediocre novel several grades below her reading level. Why does Manon torture herself so? Because words are addictive. Or something. But Manon thinks ther should be a law against ending a Whole Frickin Series (like, seven books long) by crushing her hopes and dreams AND THEN LEAVING HER TO READ TKAM IN UTTER SADNESS AND DEPRESSION. (Authors need to pay more attention to the fact that some (strange yet existant) teenage girls have a habit of using their novels to cushion the blow of the bad stuff, like having to read books that suck and not having a boyfriend. Why does this keep going back to that?)
MANON VERY ANGRY.
You know Manon very angry when she leaves out the verbs, because Manon a grammar snob.
Manon isn't going to post any more tonight because Manon is very angry.
WHAT WOULD MAKE MANON REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW:
-FangxMax
-Angel to have a better ending
-Angel to have a whole sequel that's way better (Called Iggy, duh.)
-Some sushi, beeey-otch.
-Not having to read TKAM (not even going to bother spelling it out. It's not worth the effort.)
-
Next book:TKfrickinAM
Monday, January 17, 2011
Nobody's Princess
Okay, so if this post sounds any different than any of my others (or if there's actually anyone reading this) it's because I have a reading log due for English class and I figure it would kill two birds with one stone to just hand my teacher a few pages of bloggage and be like, I read.
So, on to the book...
Nobody's Princess is a novel by Esther Friesner about a Spartan princess named Helen who will someday become Helen of Troy. The story shows her childhood in ancient Greece surrounded by heroes and Greek mythology. The interesting thing is that it is written rather than having the mythology as fantasy but as religion, thus to the character truth. There is a lot of contemplatence about the religion itself, and the fact that Helen likes certain goddesses more than others, particularly Aphrodite over Artemis.
The author spun the story a lot, however, and in some ways I wonder for what reasons. The real Helen of Troy was kidnapped by Theseus as a child. This would make an awesome plot. However, the author left it out completely, although Theseus does make an appearance and hints that Helen needs a husband to "calm her down." On the other hand, the author does add in a lot about Helen being more rebellious, taking secret swordfighting lessons with her brother's teacher and learning to hunt from her mother, then later learning to ride from the huntress Atalanta and helping her in the boar hunt.
I like the rebellion, and the fact that even though Helen was sort of a pretty brat in the beginning she became bearable once the story got started (I'd never have been able to read it otherwise) but there seems to be a lot of plot taken out of her story.
And, the one bit of creative licensing that the author is fully entitled to yet bothers me excruciatingly is the fact that Sparta traditionally had two kings, five ephors, a council of advisors, and a citezen class. Athens, on the other hand, had a democracy. In this story, both have rather simple monarchies, and Helen's family passes the crown through the daughters.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Some sushi
-Some crab rangoon and duck sauce. Like, major craving right now.
-A greek princess dress. I'll have to sew myself one.
-More books.
Next book: Nobody's Prize, the sequel to Nobody's Princess.
So, on to the book...
Nobody's Princess is a novel by Esther Friesner about a Spartan princess named Helen who will someday become Helen of Troy. The story shows her childhood in ancient Greece surrounded by heroes and Greek mythology. The interesting thing is that it is written rather than having the mythology as fantasy but as religion, thus to the character truth. There is a lot of contemplatence about the religion itself, and the fact that Helen likes certain goddesses more than others, particularly Aphrodite over Artemis.
The author spun the story a lot, however, and in some ways I wonder for what reasons. The real Helen of Troy was kidnapped by Theseus as a child. This would make an awesome plot. However, the author left it out completely, although Theseus does make an appearance and hints that Helen needs a husband to "calm her down." On the other hand, the author does add in a lot about Helen being more rebellious, taking secret swordfighting lessons with her brother's teacher and learning to hunt from her mother, then later learning to ride from the huntress Atalanta and helping her in the boar hunt.
I like the rebellion, and the fact that even though Helen was sort of a pretty brat in the beginning she became bearable once the story got started (I'd never have been able to read it otherwise) but there seems to be a lot of plot taken out of her story.
And, the one bit of creative licensing that the author is fully entitled to yet bothers me excruciatingly is the fact that Sparta traditionally had two kings, five ephors, a council of advisors, and a citezen class. Athens, on the other hand, had a democracy. In this story, both have rather simple monarchies, and Helen's family passes the crown through the daughters.
What would make me really happy right now:
-Some sushi
-Some crab rangoon and duck sauce. Like, major craving right now.
-A greek princess dress. I'll have to sew myself one.
-More books.
Next book: Nobody's Prize, the sequel to Nobody's Princess.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Catching Fire (Post #1)
I have been waiting for this book for like, forever. And that was probably grammatically incorrect, which shows how valid my point is. I do not use incorrect grammar lightly.
Actually, I have found that poor grammar can be used as a literary device to emphasize a point. Go figure.
So, back to the secong installment in Suzanne Collins' masterpiece trilogy. To spoil or not to spoil... I don't think I can do this post without spoiling, so I'll make this a spoiler post. In fact, I have decided to make two posts for it, because I think it deserves it. Plus, I have a lot to say. (See next paragraph.)
So, one thing that I noticed about this book is that it is a lot of bookage, for lack of a better word, on a number of levels. For one, there are a lot of pages (amost 400) and each page has a lot of words. Also, Suzanne Collins maintains a style invlving lots of long paragraphs and few chapter breaks, meaning that there is not a lot of blank space on these pages. There are a lot of words to read, in contrast with my beloved Fang. I'm not saying this is a bad thing, though. It covered a lot of ground.
I think I need a stylist and a prep team. I have too much reading/writing to do to worry about looking good. I think I need people to do that for me. I want my own Cinna. However, Katniss' prep team are pretty aggrivating when it comes to emotional stuff. Grr.
So, I am, if not as my next literary venture then in the next week, going to read the conclusion to the series, Mockingjay. It being the conclusion, this is the best time to make predictions on -girlsqueal- who Katniss ends up with. If anyone. Now, there are a variety of ways this could go. Peeta could die, Katniss could make out with Finnick, and then dump him for Gale. Gale could start dating Madge and then Katniss could go all -jealousyrage- and then make out with Finnick. Or Peeta could find a girlfriend with less -stabstabstabkill- and Katniss could go make out with Finnick. Or Peeta and Gale could kill each other and then Katniss could go make out with Finnick. Either way, there is almost no doubt in my mind that Katniss will, in fact, make out with Finnick. It's just indisputable.
I just realized that Finnick is at least seven years older than Katniss. Oh, well, I'm still betting on the fact that at some point they're going to make out.
I also just realized that I left out the scenario of Katniss just staying with Peeta, because this is a novel, for God's sake. If they end up together at all, Katniss will still make out with someone else at some point. We just know this.
Then there's the possibility of Suzanne introducing a new guy. Since we have the hot older beach dude, the hot artist/baker, and the hot hunter/miner, all we have left are the hot nerd and the hot dude in District 13 that does, like, refugee stuff or revolution stuff or something. Like David from Uglies, maybe. Whatever way, he'll still be hot, because people in books are always hot. *Rolls eyes* Even us book nerds seem to think that everyone is always hot. This is sad.
Well, this concludes post #1.
What would make me really happy right now:
-The Gift by James Patterson (and that other dude)
-Some sushi
-Some Australian fantasy/scifi novels. I think my Amazon gift card can take care of that problem, though :D
Next book: Mockingjay or Song of the Lioness: Alanna (The First Adventure) or some other book.
Actually, I have found that poor grammar can be used as a literary device to emphasize a point. Go figure.
So, back to the secong installment in Suzanne Collins' masterpiece trilogy. To spoil or not to spoil... I don't think I can do this post without spoiling, so I'll make this a spoiler post. In fact, I have decided to make two posts for it, because I think it deserves it. Plus, I have a lot to say. (See next paragraph.)
So, one thing that I noticed about this book is that it is a lot of bookage, for lack of a better word, on a number of levels. For one, there are a lot of pages (amost 400) and each page has a lot of words. Also, Suzanne Collins maintains a style invlving lots of long paragraphs and few chapter breaks, meaning that there is not a lot of blank space on these pages. There are a lot of words to read, in contrast with my beloved Fang. I'm not saying this is a bad thing, though. It covered a lot of ground.
I think I need a stylist and a prep team. I have too much reading/writing to do to worry about looking good. I think I need people to do that for me. I want my own Cinna. However, Katniss' prep team are pretty aggrivating when it comes to emotional stuff. Grr.
So, I am, if not as my next literary venture then in the next week, going to read the conclusion to the series, Mockingjay. It being the conclusion, this is the best time to make predictions on -girlsqueal- who Katniss ends up with. If anyone. Now, there are a variety of ways this could go. Peeta could die, Katniss could make out with Finnick, and then dump him for Gale. Gale could start dating Madge and then Katniss could go all -jealousyrage- and then make out with Finnick. Or Peeta could find a girlfriend with less -stabstabstabkill- and Katniss could go make out with Finnick. Or Peeta and Gale could kill each other and then Katniss could go make out with Finnick. Either way, there is almost no doubt in my mind that Katniss will, in fact, make out with Finnick. It's just indisputable.
I just realized that Finnick is at least seven years older than Katniss. Oh, well, I'm still betting on the fact that at some point they're going to make out.
I also just realized that I left out the scenario of Katniss just staying with Peeta, because this is a novel, for God's sake. If they end up together at all, Katniss will still make out with someone else at some point. We just know this.
Then there's the possibility of Suzanne introducing a new guy. Since we have the hot older beach dude, the hot artist/baker, and the hot hunter/miner, all we have left are the hot nerd and the hot dude in District 13 that does, like, refugee stuff or revolution stuff or something. Like David from Uglies, maybe. Whatever way, he'll still be hot, because people in books are always hot. *Rolls eyes* Even us book nerds seem to think that everyone is always hot. This is sad.
Well, this concludes post #1.
What would make me really happy right now:
-The Gift by James Patterson (and that other dude)
-Some sushi
-Some Australian fantasy/scifi novels. I think my Amazon gift card can take care of that problem, though :D
Next book: Mockingjay or Song of the Lioness: Alanna (The First Adventure) or some other book.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Fang
I love this series.
Fang, the 6th book in James Patterson's Maximum Ride series, is awesome.
I love Fang. He's gorgeous and funny and just -sigh.-
But that ending!!! How could he! It was just like J-Pat to make and epilogue with a happy ending, then add an "other epilogue" to make me crazy. I do not like the idea of MaxXDylan. Not feeling it at all. Fang must come back. -Dies of Fang-ness.-
Angel is starting to really scare me. Just saying.
It will be interesting to see where this goes.
What would make me really happy right now:
See previous post. That was three minutes ago and still applies.
Next book: either Catching Fire or Witch and Wizard.
Fang, the 6th book in James Patterson's Maximum Ride series, is awesome.
I love Fang. He's gorgeous and funny and just -sigh.-
But that ending!!! How could he! It was just like J-Pat to make and epilogue with a happy ending, then add an "other epilogue" to make me crazy. I do not like the idea of MaxXDylan. Not feeling it at all. Fang must come back. -Dies of Fang-ness.-
Angel is starting to really scare me. Just saying.
It will be interesting to see where this goes.
What would make me really happy right now:
See previous post. That was three minutes ago and still applies.
Next book: either Catching Fire or Witch and Wizard.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Behemoth
This morning I finished reading Behemoth, which is an amazing book by Scott Westerfeld. It was awesome for a multitude of reasons, but I am still kind of mad at Scott-sama for not having Deryn tell Alek she's a girl. Arrghh!!!
For anyone who doesn't know the series, Behemoth is the sequel to Leviathan, which is an alternative version of WWI in which Darwin discovered DNA and was able to fabricate animals, bringing old species back to life and creating new ones to use in daily life or war. One of the main characters, Deryn Sharp, if a fifteen year old girl disguised as a sixteen year old boy in the British Air Service, working on board the Leviathan, which is a giant whale warship that flies, basically. The other main character, Alek, is an Austrian prince who is being hunted by the Germans for a variety of reasons. The whole thing is pretty awesome.
Anyway, in celebration of finally finishing Behemoth (I've had it since FRIDAY NIGHT for god's sake!) I am Deryn Sharp for the rest of today. I'm wearing a white shirt, red tie, jeans, a bomber jacket, and combat boots, which it the best I could come up with, and pretty soon I'll be shouting "Barking Spiders!" at people when provoked.
So please, someone, provoke me so I can swear like a barking book character.
Hey, that worked.
One of the amazing things that makes the Leviathan series--Leviathan, Behemoth, and soon Goliath--is that they have illustrations. This is pretty amazing considering that most YA novels do not get cool pictures. The illustrations, I think, are very important because all the cool techy stuff is extremely difficult to describe, so pictures are kind of necessary for the reader to be able to stay on the same page as the story. Unless Scott Westerfeld wants to go into extreme boring detail about walkers and beasties and stuff, when instead he can just have the fabulous Keith Thompson draw it in perfect detail.
What would make me really happy right now:
-If someone would get me a perspicacious loris
-A short sleeved white button-down shirt
-A bomber jacket, so I don't have to borrow dad's
Next book: The Pricker Boy, by my homeroom teacher Mr. Whinnem :D
For anyone who doesn't know the series, Behemoth is the sequel to Leviathan, which is an alternative version of WWI in which Darwin discovered DNA and was able to fabricate animals, bringing old species back to life and creating new ones to use in daily life or war. One of the main characters, Deryn Sharp, if a fifteen year old girl disguised as a sixteen year old boy in the British Air Service, working on board the Leviathan, which is a giant whale warship that flies, basically. The other main character, Alek, is an Austrian prince who is being hunted by the Germans for a variety of reasons. The whole thing is pretty awesome.
Anyway, in celebration of finally finishing Behemoth (I've had it since FRIDAY NIGHT for god's sake!) I am Deryn Sharp for the rest of today. I'm wearing a white shirt, red tie, jeans, a bomber jacket, and combat boots, which it the best I could come up with, and pretty soon I'll be shouting "Barking Spiders!" at people when provoked.
So please, someone, provoke me so I can swear like a barking book character.
Hey, that worked.
One of the amazing things that makes the Leviathan series--Leviathan, Behemoth, and soon Goliath--is that they have illustrations. This is pretty amazing considering that most YA novels do not get cool pictures. The illustrations, I think, are very important because all the cool techy stuff is extremely difficult to describe, so pictures are kind of necessary for the reader to be able to stay on the same page as the story. Unless Scott Westerfeld wants to go into extreme boring detail about walkers and beasties and stuff, when instead he can just have the fabulous Keith Thompson draw it in perfect detail.
What would make me really happy right now:
-If someone would get me a perspicacious loris
-A short sleeved white button-down shirt
-A bomber jacket, so I don't have to borrow dad's
Next book: The Pricker Boy, by my homeroom teacher Mr. Whinnem :D
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